This is my very first Halloween away from Provo, UT. I think it's almost worse than missing Christmas. I don't know what I will do without Vincent the Living Skull.
We've had him since I was in seventh grade, see. He's been in every Halloween movie I've ever made. When you walk by him and the light changes, his eyes glow red and he laughs like Vincent Price (or Vincent VAN Price, if you are a 12-year-old Carly). We have some sort of a strange, mystical connection, Vincent and I.
And I will really miss my mom's witch costume with the built-in air pump.When she wears it she looks a little like Violet Beauregard as a giant blueberry on Willy Wonka. Oh, how I'll miss the gentle whirring sound that accompanies her as she makes us delicious Halloween food and frightens small children.
And the worst part is that I don't have a costume because I always rely on my mother's collection of hats and noses. I'm LOST! And furthermore, I do NOT appreciate the "whimsy" of jack-o-lantern cactus plants. It's 86 freakin' degrees here. Why even bother to leave the house at all?
I thought it would be fun to go as Brooke Shields (on account of my postpartum condition) and Mike could be Tom Cruise and I could be stabbing him with a phony knife or something. But it's not like we have a big party to go to. Maybe I'll just wear a brown paper bag over my head. Or, better yet, stay home and hand out toothbrushes and toothpaste to the weird kids in my neighborhood.
And could somebody send me a darn fall leaf? Just one!!??