Friday, January 25, 2008

Top Ten Things I Miss About the U.S. of A

10. Higher standards of cleanliness in public bathrooms.

9. DRYERS and washers that wash with hot or warm water.

8. Ovens.

7. Sidewalks.

6. Bread that doesn't suck.

5. The OPTION of hearing Karaoke.

4. The knowledge that if you order "beef stew," you will get a thick soup that contains beef, as well as other vegetables, such as carrots and potatoes, that "beef stew" is a common and universal dish, not a way to describe a large chunk of fatty meet resting atop a bed of white rice.

3. Not having to remove my shoes whenever I go inside someone's house.

2. The guarantee that if I order food at a restaurant, it WILL NOT contain large chunks of fat.

1. Never being offered--and having to go through the awkwardness of refusing--INTESTINES FRIED RICE.

Oh, yes, and being able to jump in the car and drive to Costco is a particularly sweet pleasure enjoyed by you spoiled, selfish Americans. Enjoy it. I hate you all.

8 comments:

  1. Yikes. I am so sorry about the terrible meat/fat situation. Why is it that often other countries find disgusting parts of animals edible? Intestine, stomach, fat, skin...why?! Best of luck, and I will enjoy my inalienable right to pretty food that reminds me nothing of the animal it came from.

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  2. I will try not to take our United States for granted but it's hard to keep perspective in the bathroom at Burlington Coat Factory--have you SEEN it?

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  3. Ahhh, the intestines fried rice. Been there, done that! Have you tried some of the breads that are stuffed with beans? Not right.

    Hang in there tiger!

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  4. Who ever said intestines weren't a food group? Americans have no idea how good we have it. Glad to hear you guys are alive. DMP

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  5. I have to remove my shoes when I go to my visiting teachee's house and it bugs me. I used to always go on my way home from work so I had to carry socks in my purse to put on when I got there.

    I miss you being in an adjacent time zone so we can chat all day.

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  6. You could always get on a train or bus and ride to Costco. They are in Taiwan. They're in Japan too, but I never did get to go when I was there.

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  7. Oh, yes, Sorro. I have taken two trains and one bus to Costco. That's how complicated it is to go there. You have to get on one train, switch to another, catch a bus, walk a while, and then you arrive at Costco. It's like heaven until you realize that all the wonderful things in your cart will have to be carried by you and you, alone, back on that bus and those two trains. It creates strong, conflicting emotions, and is not recommended for the faint of heart.

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  8. We went to Costco TWICE this weekend. Nyah!

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