I've been engaged in my usual philosophical battle: to blog or not to blog? Sometimes I think my style of blogging is out of touch, but then I think that I don't want to join the ranks of the blog braggers (you know, the people who seem to conduct their lives according to the dictates of what will make excellent photos for their blogs), which is such a fast-growing and huge movement that I feel very much left out in the cold. Maybe you think I already am a blog bragger? I sincerely hope not....
So, then I think, well, instead of being a blog bragger, I could just blog a record of my children and family, which is probably the selfless and proper thing to do. But since when have I ever been selfless and proper? Ummm--hello!--never. I figure that between the hours of 7:00 am and 7:00 pm the world necessarily revolves around my children. Why inflate their heads with a blog dedicated solely to them as well? All of these thoughts inevitably lead me back to where I started: why blog at all unless it is about what a fool I am? So, without further ado, The Stupid Things I Did In December:
1. Came home from church crying 2 out of 4 Sundays because my new calling as Relief Society secretary is inexplicably kicking my trash. (Sometimes ladies can be very cranky about their weekly R.S. bulletins).
2. In an act of total desperation (as a result of aforementioned calling), I asked a lady who I have never seen before to say the opening prayer in Relief Society. The kicker? She wasn't even in our ward, not that I knew the difference.
3. Attempted to dip homemade marshmallows in homemade fudge: the fudge wouldn't stick, I tell you!
4. Threw out the fudge (after eating most of it with my fingers), then gave our neighbors and friends plain homemade marshmallows with no hot chocolate mix, candy canes, or cinnamon sticks. "Merry Christmas. Here, enjoy this ziplock bag of plain amorphous marshmallows courtesy of the Pauls." Classy.
5. Sprayed fake snow on pine cones,and plastic wreaths, and windows, and the floor, and the counter.....
6. Painstakingly wrapped lights and a garland around our porch railing, only to forget to turn the lights on ever again.
7. Made chocolate peanut butter truffles and then ate all of them myself, making myself completely sick every day.
8. Bought Mike a sweater for Christmas. He hates sweaters for Christmas, but every year I succumb to the temptation to dress him like a professor.
9. Went snowmobiling with Mike and screamed and chuckled in a deep, mannish voice the whole time until I almost fell off the back.
10. Bought the makings for a huge Christmas dinner, and then didn't feel like cooking on Christmas day, so just served leftovers.
There. Comment all you like--comments about the amount of calories involved in my adventures are ESPECIALLY appreciated.