Wednesday, October 13, 2004

Ten Things I am Ashamed that I Cry Over

It's okay to cry at some things--like Lord of the Rings and the death of a loved one--but here are a few things that I wish didn't move me to tears.

10. Any (and I mean ANY) episode of VH1's "Behind the Music." It's shameful. Any story is fair game: Milli Vanilli, Vanilla Ice, Salt 'n' Peppa, I could go on.

9. Any moment of tenderness between Bart and Lisa Simpson (i.e., the episode when they go to military school and Bart cheers Lisa on as she finishes the obstacle course . . . gets me every time).

8. Those Sylvan Learning Center commercials. You know, the ones where the mom's all "Janie, time for bed" and Janie's like "in a minute," then the mom realizes that Janie is reading, and the music swells . . .

7. This picture:

6. "Nessun Dorma" from Puccini's opera "Turandot." I am an opera fan, but, despite my two years of Italian learning in college, I don't really know what this song is about. All I know is that at the end the dude goes "vincero, vincero, vincero," which means "I will triumph," and I say to myself "yes, I WILL triumph" (tear).

5. The tearful reactions of home owners on "Trading Spaces," or any other surprise room-make-over show, for that matter. I cry when they are happy (when Vern has redone their room), and when they are sad (when Doug has turned their living room into a brown, "art-deco" theater).

4. When people don't read my blog--hahaha. I've even been known to delete my blog because of it.

3. The thought of Martha Stewart doing hard time in Camp Cupcake.

2. Memories of the 2000 election results

1. Certain episodes of "Wife Swap"


  1. I agree that these are all things to be ashamed of crying over with one exception: The Leif Garrett episode where he meets the guy he put in a wheel chair and the guy forgives him. I feel that this is a legitimate thing to cry over. I mean, if you're a sissy. And I'd just like to underscore something you said. It really is important to hold back those tears during the Bart/Lisa moments (such as the end of the big hockey game) because if you don't you are so lame.

  2. Hahaha. Good to know I'm not the only pathetic one out there.

  3. Okay...just so you know, until I buck up and become a blogger, I'm going to put my initals at the beginning of my posts so I dont' get mixed up with the other anonymous folks who are writing to you. So my format will be the following:

    MGP: Okay so, Having now looked at this Robert Plant picture twice, I want to know who is in the pic with him? Son, Lover, Something else? Everyone is upset by this pic clearly and it has left me wondering, are you upset just at the fact that RP now looks like a somewhat overweight, smelly, made-for-tv movie villain roles actor or does it have to do with something more?...please explain.

  4. MGP: me again. I just wanted to add, now having looked at the Robert Plant picture about 8 times, that regardless of who the other dude is, I REALLY want to touch his arm. Can you believe how soft it looks?

  5. The other person in the picture is RP's son. The reason why this pic is so devastating is that clearly, he is no longer the "Tall Cool One." He now looks more like the wrinkled, squatty one. It is a huge departure from his more handsome days--the end of an era, if you will. See for more details.

  6. If MGP is Michael P. then I'm not ashamed to say that I feel like crying.

  7. MGP is not MAP, so don't cry Christian.

  8. Doesn't "Nessun Dorma" make everybody cry? If it doesn't, it should.

  9. Good to know there's another opera fan out there (or at least someone who has heard Nessun Dorma).