Friday, May 16, 2008
On Why I Love my Mother
I know it's late to be talking about my mom. Mother's Day was, afterall, a week ago. But I've been doin' me some thinkin' about all this "motherhood" business. Come on, what's the BIG DEAL with it, huh? I am getting sick of women going on and on about "motherhood" like it's some institution they are a part of, i.e., "ah, motherhood. Sometimes it's really hard, but it's SO rewarding and wonderful." Blech. To be honest with you, I don't really think about "motherhood" all that often. I don't, for example, wake up every morning to my 2 year old whispering "mommy, wake up, mommy" in my face and think "what challenges and rich rewards will 'motherhood' bring me today?" In reality, I'm thinking of the best way to convince Hazel to go back downstairs and watch cartoons for a little while longer so I can sleep more. Nothing glorious, horribly hard, or wonderful about it. I tire of all this glorification of motherhood, as well as all the complaining about how hard it is and how much it sucks, etc. And THAT is why, my friends, I love my OWN mother so much: I have never ONCE heard her even use the WORD "motherhood." She doesn't complain, she dosen't over-glorify. She pretty much just lives her life as a human being who works hard and loves her kids and doesn't have to be constantly discussing what it means to be a mom. I feel like this whole "motherhood" phenomemon is a recent trend. What gives? I realize that moms are great and they do great things, but MUST we go on and on about it? My mom never did and never does. She's just a mom. And that is why I love her. Plus, she makes rice krispy treats with melted chocolate and toasted almonds on top of them. If I could leave a legacy like that for MY kids, I would be content.
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Carly,
ReplyDeleteYou just made my day! Thanks for making me laugh.
Does this mean there are rice krispy treats with chocolate and almonds on them floating around at the parental palace? I'm so there.
ReplyDeleteBut yeah - I feel the same way about better homemaking websites. I don't want to know how to improve my homemaking and motherhood skills. I just want to maintain the status quo.
Hmmmm...something to think about. I understand what you're saying, just never thought of it that way. Mothers do need to be shown appreciation for all their sacrifices, but do we go overboard on defining and pressuring a "perfect mom"? I think so. I am Alisa. I am a mother, but I was Alisa first, and always will be. Sometimes we forget that don't we?
ReplyDeleteAfter your last post I've been CRAVING more of your raw-honest looks at the world. Once again you have hit the nail right on the head. (I wish I could write like you).
ReplyDeleteAnd I am SO making my rice krispy treats like that next time.
Right on. I tend to feel the same way. I also feel pretty ambivalent about decorating: it's nice to have an attractive house, but really, must we all obsess about it and pour tons of money into it like its elocution is the very measure of our personal worth? Uh, no. I have motherhood/parenting and decorating disconnects with many women, so it's nice to have some solidarity on the subject. Tight.
ReplyDeleteCrap. I meant execution.
ReplyDeleteYeah. I'm bored with motherhood.
ReplyDeleteI've been trying to explain in a philosophy paper I am writing that if you say you are an unselfish person then you aren't. It is only those that don't know they are unselfish that truely are. Do you mind if I use your post as an example? you put it better than I ever could. Don't worry full credit will be given.
ReplyDeleteczkohvI think its has to do with the spotlight mentality. Thinking I have to do something that will change the world or will get me on TV. Instead we have regular old lives. Never mind that having children will give you feelings of the greatest joy in life. So in order to make it seem that your regular old existance is something special, you get the grandification of Motherhood. Face it women have been doing it for centuries. The 21st century woman is losing her identity as the father takes on more child rearing duties. She has to do something to make here feel good about her role as she gets liberated... My wife works and is a mom to her boys. Nuf said. DMP
ReplyDeleteCathy,
ReplyDeleteI am honored that you would use my post, but a little embarrassed. It's not that well thought-out. But feel free...in my grand selflessness I will allow you to use it.