Friday, November 7, 2008

Movin' On

I am so glad this election is finally over. I hope that people can stop making (subconscious??) racist comments about the results and get on board with the positivity. Cause that was a great moment, yo. And if you are still wondering where I stood since I was so cryptic on my blog, just know that I felt so happy that for the first time in my short voting career, the person I voted for actually WON. What a moment for ME!

But I want to move on and stop talking about all this, because I have even MORE important things to discuss. Here are just a few issues I hope President-Elect Obama will address when he moves into the white house:

1. Corn Syrup: I really hope Obama perpetuates this new push to clear high fructose corn syrup of its nasty reputation. Cause, hey, it's natural. And it's FINE in moderation (see the ads).

2. Hamburger: all my life ground beef has been a staple. Now suddenly normal people are telling me that they "rarely" or even "never" buy it. How the hell are these people making tacos? How are they making lasagna, spaghetti, meat loaf, Hamburger Helper, for crying out loud? Obama needs to bring this gross oversight into the public eye and start passing some pro-burger laws (and if anyone needs some tips for browning themselves up a little hamburger, you can call on me).

3. Trunk-or-treats: hey, I get it if you live in a scary city. Otherwise, stop trying to control your children's entire LIVES. Let them get their candy the old fashioned way on Halloween: by trick or treating on foot in a neighborhood you know and trust. Trunk or Treats are ruining the fabric of society. In my day, we walked miles. Then we came home and ate our candy at whatever pace we saw fit. If that meant consuming the entire bag that night, our parents did not stop us. We didn't have candy fairies, candy taxes, or any candy rules. We learned from stomach aches and disappointment when we ran out of candy too soon. 'nuff said.

I'm sure Obama will address these issues once he is done sewing us all traditional Communist Mao suits and implanting microchips into our heads.

10 comments:

  1. Ok, Carly this is the one that did it.

    I have been lurking on your blog for years but never commented because you were Jill's friend, not mine. You were just Kacy's, sometimes annoying, little sister.

    But this blog is perfect. From the political commentary, right through to hamburger and Halloween candy. I give you a big AMEN!

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  2. And I have a friend who seriously thinks that is exactly what Obama has done and will continue to do. He put it as getting us to drink Obama's Kool-aid, but I like the microchip analogy better.

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  3. I wanted to thank you for all your help this week and now I have to thank you for getting me to laugh really loud this morning over your great posts. If I were a jewelry maker I'd make you a #1 Visiting Teacher charm for a necklace. You're the best.

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  4. Didn't you get your microchip on election day? It's in your "I Voted" sticker. He's nothing if not efficient. And effective. And eloquent. And that SCARES ME!

    Just kidding. Regarding high fructose corn syrup: Could we thin it out a little so it runs through sippy cups better? Glug glug!

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  5. Thanks for the humor! Now I might even be able to make it through my "Telephone Training" meeting today.

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  6. Um, thanks for the comment, Dede. I was always under the impression that Kacy's friends found me charming and pleasant. Thank you for disavowing me of that misconception. Oh, and thanks for the props and the AMEN.

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  7. Once again you have hit the nail on the head. I do feel a need to bring to your attention that we have Oprah to thank for the lack of hamburger usage. Hopefully Obama will put her to good use.

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  8. I was hoping we could be friends, but now that I know your true sentiments on hamburger, corn syrup and halloween candy, I'm thinking maybe we could be BEST friends. Hmm, perhaps I should have asked you this question first--before I announced the best friends thing--What movie features these lines:

    Ed: Mmm, Mmm, Mmm, I don't know why they call this stuff Hamburger Helper. It does just fine by itself, huh?
    Clark: You're the gormet around here, Ed.

    Sometimes I wonder why I cant just write concise, on topic comments.

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  9. Thank you for finally saying what we were all thinking. If these important issues do not get addressed, I think we will all be disappointed.

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  10. Lasagna and tacos take too much effort and foresight. You really have to plan ahead. I'm not very good at entrees that require more than one ingredient.

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